I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Its about making memories worth repressing
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
