this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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