I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
