the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Randomize
