Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Vodka?
Forever.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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