I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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