You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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