ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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