That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
