Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize