Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Randomize
