I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Houston, we have a squirter
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
