remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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