Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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