They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
