i think i have herpe
just one?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
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