She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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