I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
My liver just broke up with me...
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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