Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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