I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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