Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
