I like to think it a success when the cops are called
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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