If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
