I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
We are two peas in an std pod
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
