I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
