The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
