My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize
