you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
