If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
