doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
