I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
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