Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
