so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
