Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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