Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
