so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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