Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
