Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
