And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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