New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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