Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
