so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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