He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
