Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize