i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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