if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
