There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
