i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
