so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Randomize
