I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize