so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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